Help with letter to businesses/PM

[dsnorrod]

Hey guys, its starting to warm up here in Middle TN and with the reciept of an AWESOME Delco Cobalt from Russ, I'm ready to get going. I typed up this letter in the hopes of sending it to some PMs and businesses in the area to get some good business. I was hoping some of the vets could take a look and see if it is something that would make you want to use my business.

If it helps, here is a little background on my business: I've been mowing for a couple of years now, having just gone official last year, so I have a few customers with that. I'll be pulling one trailer with my PW stuff on the front and my mower on the back so I can do it all from one rig. I'm really looking forward to pressure washing this summer. I have learned a lot from you guys as well has having had a few years hands on with my uncle's PW business. Any help is welcome!

Daniel

 

[John Doherty]

Change the I's to you and yours, etc.

I can clean dirty concrete, mold and mildew from exterior walls, and remove the annoying gum people leave behind.

Your dirty concrete, mold and mildew on your walls, and those ugly gum stains will disappear, leaving you with a clean inviting entry, building blah blah blah...

Make it about the customer not you.

 

[Steven Button]

... when you ask questions in a letter, you should bullet point your answers.

ie. What do we offer?

- Premium Landscaping Services
- Comprehensive Pressure Washing Services
- Total Property Maintenance Packages
- Majestic Rubber Mulch Nuggets
- 100 % Belly Button Fluff Knitted Sweaters
- .... etc, etc.

It looks more professional, breaks up the letter content and draws their eyes to the 'benefits' or points you are trying to make.

Think of it like this... how often do you read the whole letter when you get some advertising or marketing from another company in the mail. Most people skim read, make it easier for them.

Also, give serious thought to your follow up after the introductory letter. Perhaps put an offer, pen, business card or something to catch their attention in the first letter... again, you want them to remember when you follow up with other marketing materials, phone calls or visits.

 

[dsnorrod]

Thanks for the replys!! That is exactly the kind of advice I was looking for. I'll work on it and post another draft later. Any others want to chime in?

 

[Christopher]

Great comments guys. Thanks.





_______________
Superior Power Washing<O</O
Chris Chappell<O</O
361-853-2513<O</O
prostaff@superiorpowerwashing.com
Low Pressure Roof Cleaning Corpus Christi Texas<O</O
Shingle Roof Washing and Tile Roof Washing Corpus Christi Texas

 

[precisionpower]

Pop Quiz!!!! Anyone know what the most important part of any letter is, and the part most likely to be read first?

 

[Chris Francis]

Nope what is it kevin.

 

[Danny Bates]

Signature???

 

[Big Dog]

I bet it's the big headline at the top

 

[Chris Francis]

business letter first 3 lines in name address it has to be the company name.

 

[precisionpower]

Keep guessing. Nobody has come close yet. When I reveal it, you'll all thank me later! Someone has to know this.

 

[Larry Millette]

The description of your business profile. (What can I do for you?) (Who we are.)

 

[Greg Rentschler]

The call to action....... call by such and such date for a discount or special added benefit.

 

[crfguy168]

The stamp to see if a real person sent it???

 

[crfguy168]

What color paper??

 

[crfguy168]

What color ink, pictures ???

 

[crfguy168]

Just tell us!!!!!

 

[Steven Button]

... the envelope

 

[crfguy168]

... the envelope

I said stamp... same thing, lol

 

[dsnorrod]

Hey guys, I incorporated some of the changes that you suggested. Here is a revised copy.


KEVIN, I'm anxious to hear what the most important part is!

Also, I'm curious to hear how this has worked out for others if anyone has tried it. I intend to follow up about a week after they are sent. They are all local so it should not take more then a day or two for them to get it.