Tony Shelton
BS Detector, Esquire
YOU MAY BE A TALIBAN IF...
1. You refine heroin for a living, but youhave a moral objection to
beer.
2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you
can't afford shoes.
3. You have more wives than teeth.
4. You wipe your butt with your bare left hand, but
consider bacon "unclean."
5. You think vests come in two styles:bullet-proof and
suicide.
6. You can't think of anyone youhaven't declared
Jihad against.
7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives
in your clothing.
8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other thansetting off roadside bombs.
9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least one.
10. You've always had a crush on yourneighbor's goat.
1. You refine heroin for a living, but youhave a moral objection to
beer.
2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you
can't afford shoes.
3. You have more wives than teeth.
4. You wipe your butt with your bare left hand, but
consider bacon "unclean."
5. You think vests come in two styles:bullet-proof and
suicide.
6. You can't think of anyone youhaven't declared
Jihad against.
7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives
in your clothing.
8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other thansetting off roadside bombs.
9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least one.
10. You've always had a crush on yourneighbor's goat.
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