Funny Comments from Troopers in S.C.

[Doug Rucker]

These are actual comments made by South Carolina Troopers that
were taken off their car videos:

1. "You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you
just went through."

2. "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll
stretch after you wear them a while."

3. "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth
certificate a worthless document." (My Favorite)

4. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

5. "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's
the speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you." (LOVE IT)

6. "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I
can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?"

7. "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't
think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?"

8. "Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you
another ticket."

9. "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are
drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

10. "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go
to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey
poop."

11. "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster
oven."

12. "In God we trust; all others we run through NCIC." ( National Crime
Information Center )

13. "Just how big were those 'two beers' you say you had?"

14. "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're
allowed to write as many tickets as we can."

15. "I'm glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of
yours. So you know someone who can post your bail."
AND THE WINNER IS....

16. "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we
don't. Sign here."*

 

[Christopher]

Those are good ones. hahahahahahaha

 

[Mike V]

Good Stuff......they need to include some from the video Lou posted the other day.

 

[Nichole]

Hilarious! Thanks for the laugh this morning!

 

[FullBlast]

I don't think it would help to talk to the cheif superviser!!!!!

I had a funny one about like this one day while on the job washing. It was the man I was washing for and he come storming in and chewed me out for having the heaters turned on, (it was 20*f). Saying that it was costing him alot of money, and I told him that our policy is to have it a minum of 45*. O he cussed me out and told me how crazy I was, and told me that he was going to call the boss, slammed the door and stormed out!!

He called the office my wife answered and he gave her a ear full and ask to speak with the owner of the company, she told him that the owner was at his place working.
He never did come back in!!

 

[The Cleaner]

I like the Mickey Mouse one ....lol

 

[Carolina Prowash]

I think I may have heard some of those personally I learned the hard way not to break any traffic rules in SC!

 

[AspenPW]

Did you hear about the empademic going on in New York? Everyone is catching it but the New York police officers.

Only cause they cant catch anything anyhow...